I wonder why I slowly lost my ability to concentrate. I don’t think the internet helped, instead of furthering learning with the various courses. It probably spilled over into work. Particularly the brainless ones 

The Math Sorcerer has a video at the beginning of the year which addresses the frustration I had with linear algebra. He suggests that math majors learn to deal with failure and frustration, which helps them in life Now the question remains on how to apply this theory in my life. How much of three years in Ashley remains in my life, and more importantly, what did I miss the two years I had spent in Nanticoke before Ashley. Perhaps the conflict between two worldviews have controlled me instead of my taking charge of which way I chose situationally.
I was looking through my fourth-grade notebook, and it occurred to me that I was doing homework with the linear algebra the same way I did social studies at that time in the fourth grade.
I just began a video from Thomas Garrity about mathematical maturity and how being frustrated and failure leads to a revelation that clears the confusion. I recall that in Nanticoke I had plenty of time to make sense of my interests.

Sat 26 Mar 22  15:25
I spent some time with the vectors again, trying to visualize them. I think the engineering majors had a definite advantage in linear algebra and differential equations. I also wonder whether they had numerical methods as well in setting up equations and solving such problems.

Sun 27 Mar 22  16:12
The slowdown allows me to go through my former ambitions in chemical engineering. After their webinar on emotional intelligence, I wonder whether it had been a factor in the entire scheme I overlooked in the fall of 1982 the same as I had done in 1976.

As I write this diary, I don’t think that I ever would be writing about my experiences in 1972. I couldn’t conceive beyond 1972, let alone fifty years later.